Fear is our biggest obstacle in life and it can signal that a decision or action is needed. Fear causes us to withdraw, hide, procrastinate, run away and berate ourselves. I’d slipped into fear yesterday ruminating over past decisions and berating myself. I knew I needed a spiritual awakening. I needed to see my behavior in a more compassionate light, to let the sun shine into my being and bring a burst of clarity and consciousness into my day. I needed to forgive myself for past mistakes and let go of the feelings that were only poisoning me. Forgiveness is always an action we take to more fully love ourselves. Fear fuels resentment. We mistakenly believe that if we stay mad and resentful, we’ll prevent the hurt from reoccurring. In truth resentment only poisons us, not the person we’re resenting. We know we’ve had a spiritual awakening when we act more courageously in situations that used to generate fear. When we do the next right thing and let go of the outcome, we feel a light guiding our pathway for living.

Instead of focusing on my sense of direction in my new environment, I questioned the choices that brought me here. Instead of having faith that even though I’m in the hallway of the in-between where one door has closed before the new door has opened, I slipped into self-pity and self-doubt judging all that is new and unfamiliar and missing what I’ve left behind. I recognized that I’d slipped into a spiritual void. Sometimes it takes a rude awakening where undesirable parts of ourselves are revealed to the world leaving us humbled. The barriers we’ve set up that have kept us stuck come tumbling down. The spiritual awakening comes when we see any painful situation as an opportunity to grow. The heavy feelings of fear and doubt are not facts. We realize that we’re capable of facing anything life brings our way.

When I returned home, I opened an uplifting email with pictures of our 14 year old cat that we’d left behind with our veterinarian. He’d found a loving family with an employee that had taken him home for Hurricane Ike. I was reminded that there’s a force, a drive, an energy that gives meaning to life no matter how things seem. No matter what we’re doing, we can view the smallest tasks as joyous and productive. We can accept that we’re not alone in the Universe, that we’re part of a grand design. Spiritual awakenings end loneliness and give us a sense of direction. We confront something larger than we are and come to believe that forces beyond our understanding are operating allowing us to see the bigger picture. Our ego deflates and our view of the world expands. Our experience leaves no doubt that we’ve tapped into a power greater than our own.

The results of spiritual awakenings no matter how small allow us to think and act more spontaneously. We lose interest in judging ourselves and others. We enjoy the moment, have frequent attacks of smiling, and experience overwhelming episodes of gratitude. We find ourselves more receptive to the love we’re receiving and feel a greater need to give more love. It’s clear that waiting for others to change in order for us to be happy is futile. We have a new appreciation for life. We hear the sounds of birds singing and notice the beauty of nature. We’re more understanding and empathic toward others and act with greater honesty and integrity. Spiritual awakenings are as individual as we are. No matter how hard the journey may seem, when we feel whole and bursting with Spirit we are fulfilling our purpose in the world with love and life.

Please write to me at sandyislands@hawaii.rr.com and feel free to browse previous articles under publications at www.sandyislands.com.