By Dr. Sandy Islands for Conch Color
These articles have purposefully been written using the collective voice of “we.” There are countless ways that we separate ourselves from each other. “One Human Family” comes from the truth that we are all unified no matter what our race, gender, sexual orientation, age, financial status, or education is. We are all created in the image and likeness of God and we are all connected. If we don’t like the word, “God,” let’s picture an all kind, all loving and wise source of Energy bigger than our minds and personalities. The ocean is vast and beautiful. Let’s imagine that we took a dropper full of water and placed it under a microscope. That’s us. The ocean is the Higher Energy Source. We’ll find that the water in the dropper is made of the exact same material as the body of the ocean itself. We are small part of the larger whole. Let’s entertain the possibility that we are Spiritual beings having a human experience. Our spirits are connected to the One Great Spirit in unity.
This is not to say that humans don’t have their differences. But, if we practice looking for similarities and common experiences, we break those walls of prejudice, hatred and fear. Any act of unity demonstrates a commitment to growth and well being. We’ve all heard the expression, “divide and conquer.” This is the exact opposite of unity. Many of us grew up in homes where there was a constant state of division, where words or violence were used to pit one family member against the other. Words saying, “Why can’t you be more like…?” were attempts to motivate but only ended up discouraging. We might have grown up with the many faces of addiction which when we pointed out the elephant in the living room, we were told we were crazy and that the only problem was what we were pointing out. Who could we trust in those moments – our instincts and experiences, or the cancellation and denial from those we looked up to? In the end, many of us grow up trusting no one, let alone ourselves. Unity allows us to trust and take chances. It’s not too late to feel a part of a community. It’s not too late to let go of anger from the past and feel grateful that we’ve survived. We’re awake, aware and we don’t have to make the same mistakes that our caregivers did.
In unity, we work together for what’s best for the common whole. Unity may feel uncomfortable and unfamiliar when we’re first aware of how separated we feel and want to change. There’s nothing to fear. Change begins when we’re willing to express our truth without fear of the consequences- when we’re willing to call attention to the elephant no matter who else agrees. We practice our right to freedom of speech. We begin to include and consider everyone’s opinions. We may have been exposed to dominant and passive extremes of decision making which left us feeling confused and unable to make our own decisions. Or, we’ve modeled one of these dysfunctional patterns without asking if there was another way. Instead of “I’m okay and you’re not,” or “I’m not OK and you are,” we find balance in “I’m OK and you’re OK.” At the group level, working in unity can bring relief as collective decisions are made with respect for all involved.
By just looking at ourselves, we notice that our own attitudes are what isolate us today. When we find a place in our hearts for peace and acceptance, we create connections with each other based upon unity and harmony. We learn to listen and listen to learn. Forging bonds of unity helps us to heal our past wounds and together we are One. Please write to Dr. Sandy Islands at sandyislands@hawaii.rr.com.